Psalms of Nicodemus

Coming New Year 2027

Genre: YA Contemporary/LGBTQ+/Literary

Nicodemus must reconcile himself with his lifelong Lutheran faith and his growing relationship with Emmanuel, all while under the oppressive eye of his Lutheran High School.

Summary

When Nicodemus started at Redeemer Lutheran High, he quashed a true rumor that he was gay. Doing so allowed him to avoid expulsion, public humiliation, and/or his parents throwing him out of the house. Four years later, Nic moves carefully and deliberately to keep his head down. Pastor Boulder preaches the evils of "tolerance" in his Worldviews course, while bolstering his own brand of Christianity, leaving Nic to grapple with his sense of identity, faith (or lack thereof), and safety.

Nic faces a further challenge when Emmanuel, a self-analyzing shot putter transfer student from public school, casually slides into his life. It's not long before the school administration is alerted to a possible "gay subculture," leading to teachers stalking the halls and surveilling students. When a student is suspected of being the informant, Nic must decide whether to stand with Emmanuel and the life he wants or to remain in the shadows of the faith he's always known.

This novel is inspired by my own experiences as a gay teen in a religious school and the lifelong psychological scars religious education leaves. My hope is that this book can reassure LGBTQ+ youth trapped in these schools that there is a way out, while also showing others that explicit conversion therapy is not the only psychological harm perpetrated by Christian education initiatives.

Central Characters

Nicodemus (Nic) - a gay student at Redeemer trying to make his way through senior year without getting caught. He lives cautiously, overanalyzing every interaction for the threat or the benefit. He longs to escape Redeemer to finally begin living an open life.
Emmanuel (Emmy) - a transfer student from the public school, Emmy is a shot putter with a simple honesty about him. Coming from a loving hippie home, Emmy is confident and secure in who he is. He serves as both a spiritual and personal foil for Nic.
Fiona - one of Nic's best friends. She aspires to medical school and is in a relationship with Trever. Fiona is an emotional support for Nic, and the friend who indulges his need to be fatalistic.
Trever - one of Nic's best friends. He is a football player at the school and known for his confident and casual demeanor. Trever pushes Nic to confront his feelings and take chances, especially as it's senior year.
Pastor Boulder (PBo) - Redeemer Lutheran High's religion teacher, currently teaching Worldviews to Nic and his classmates. PBo is passionate about his teachings, while retaining some of the oft preached compassion. His passion combines with his mercurial nature, causing him to lash out at students who push beyond his patience for intellectual pushback.
Michael - a former close friend of Nic's and leader of the Archangels, a Christian rock band and clique at Redeemer. Michael remains rigid in the Lutheran dogma, viewing Nic as a corrupting influence on Emmy and the school at large.